Dining Etiquette in 2013

Is placing one’s elbows on the table really that offensive?

It may be a matter of your cultural background, but many people still abide by a variety of etiquette rules. Even if one chooses not to obey these rules in their own home, it is still wise to know what is considered rude and not rude for when one does find him or herself in a dining setting where etiquette is considered an important factor.

Let’s take a look at some of these dining etiquette rules. It’s a good idea to review this list because a lot has changed since our grandparents were out dining.

Whether you follow you decide to follow them is up to you (and we aren’t judging one way or the other), but we think these are important for all people to know. Here they are:

• For almost all meals, if you are wondering what utensil to use, start from the outside and work your way in. So, if you are served a salad first, use the fork set to the far left of your plate.
• Your water glass is the one above your knife in your place setting.
• Don’t chew with your mouth open.
• When ordering food, forget gender – people should order when ready. Gone are the days when women were expected to go first. Since menus can be long and complex, regardless of one’s sex it’s a courtesy to order first and buy tablemates a bit more time to decide.
• Never tweet, text, check email, or surf the web while dining with others.
• Men go through doors first, and then hold them open for women. This is arguably the one rule of chivalry that will never die. Bottom line: two people can’t go through a door at the same time. So to the women out there who find this notion antiquated, please, humor these poor men. Let them get the door – they’ll let you get the bill or walk on the outside once out on the street.
• When you need to go to the restroom, simply say “Excuse me, please; I’ll be right back.”

When you are finished with your course, the custom is as follows:

1. Place the knife and fork parallel with the handles in the four o’clock position on the right rim of the plate.
2. The tips of the utensils rest in the well of the plate in the ten o’clock position.
3. The blade of your knife should face inward.
4. The fork tines may be either up or down.
5. This position signals to the server that you are finished. It also decreases the chance that the utensils could fall to the floor when the plates are cleared.

Oh, and before we forget, placing one’s elbows on the table is rude in certain settings, but in most informal settings, you should be fine to relax.

If you are interested in more etiquette tips, we have found a valuable resource here.

Do you have an etiquette tip we should have included? Please let us know in a comment below.